Rupert James Alison and Rose C Jiggens are delighted to be bringing Betty Martin’s Wheel of Consent to Bristol in 2019. This powerful model enables us to take our understanding of consent to a whole new level by asking not just what we might do, but why we might do it – in other words, who is it for? When someone touches us, are we receiving what we want, or allowing for their pleasure – and have both of us agreed to this?
The Wheel recognises that without clarifying the intention as well as the action, it is not possible to give or receive fully-informed consent. This creates four quadrants or dynamics of experience, which occur all the time in human relating, and especially when we interact physically.
This brand new weekend workshop has been devised by Betty and other teachers at the School of Consent, to empower you to integrate the principles of the Wheel of Consent into all areas of your life.
The weekend will involve invitations into learning, discussion, and experiential exercises. There will be the opportunity to share some simple, clothed touch exercises, mostly limited to the hand and forearm, in order to have a direct experience of each of the Wheel’s quadrants. Any shared touch is purely optional, and by explicit verbal consent. You do not have to touch, or be touched by anyone else to take part in this workshop. Slowing down, paying close attention, and noticing that we have a choice, is far more important than any actual ‘doing’.
The group will also reflect together on how our conditioning might close down or distort our expression of each of the quadrants, and how we can use the Wheel as a practice to open them up again. There are many reasons why our consent skills may be less complete than they could be, including:
– Being brought up as a ‘good boy or girl’, which creates a habit of over-riding our own needs and desires
– Our own privilege, or lack of it, may affect our expectations of what is or isn’t reasonable to expect from life in general, and connections with others in particular.
– We may be embarrassed about stating our desires or boundaries in a sexual or intimate context.
– We may never have been taught how to take full ownership of our own capacity for pleasure.
– Sometimes we may be emotionally triggered or frozen, and therefore temporarily disconnected from our own authenticity.
– There may be an inherent power dynamic, which prevents us relating as equals.
Getting really good at consent makes life more joyful and empowering for everyone, while reducing upset through misunderstandings and consent accidents. People of all genders, orientations and relationship status are welcome. You are welcome to book on your own, or with one or more friends or partners. If you book with a friend or partner, you are welcome to share touch exclusively with that person, it that’s what you both choose.
Facilitators: Rupert James Alison & Rose C Jiggens
Sat 16th February: 10.30am – 5.30pm
Sun 17th February: 10.30am – 5.30pm
Spaces are limited and must be booked in advance. Please email email@example.com or go to https://www.artofconsent.co.uk/contact, and ask me for payment details.
Cost: £160 (supportive) / £140 (regular) / £120 (low-income) / £95 (very low-income). (Paying the supportive rate allows us to enable people on low and very low incomes to attend). Payments are 100% refundable with four weeks’ notice and 50% refundable with two weeks’ notice.
On booking we will ask you to send us a couple of sentences describing why you would like to attend, and any particular needs you might have, to help us get a sense of the group beforehand. Many thanks.
Rupert has been holding space for groups since 1992, when he qualified as a yoga and meditation teacher. Since then he has trained in depth with many internationally renowned teachers of conscious intimacy, relationship and consent work. He is the founder and director of Ecstasy and Intimacy, is a certified practitioner of Urban Tantra, and a qualified teacher at the School of Being. Rupert is also a facilitator-in-training with Betty Martin’s School of Consent.
Rose (formerly Cathryn) Jiggens is a Tantra practitioner working with individuals, couples and groups since 2009. She has undertaken many trainings in Neo-Tantra, Tantra massage, Shamanism and Bioenergetics, mainly with internationally renowned teacher John Hawken. The emerging field of somatic sexology also strongly informs her approach; she is a member of the professional body ASIS – the Association of Somatic and Integrative Sexologists www.the-asis.org/. She is also the founder of Tantra4Tigers, see www.tantra4tigers.com
See also: www.schoolofconsent.org
We’d love it if you feel called to join us!
Rupert & Rose